Are you LinkedIn? Is your face in the “book?” (FaceBook, that is.) Do you Yahoo!? Got space on MySpace? Blogspot? CafeMom?
As I’ve been updating my networking site profiles and website information, I find myself waxing a bit nostalgic. Wasn’t business better when we stopped by colleagues’ or competitors’ offices, made phone calls, had lunch? Weren’t families better when we lived up the road from Grandma’s house and she didn’t have to watch the kiddos grow up via webcam?
Business banter loves the global marketplace. You can work on both coasts simultaneously, outsource your IT operations to Asia, and sell to multiple markets without leaving your home office. Suddenly suppliers’ competition skyrockets and it feels like everyone is a potential customer.
As families become more mobile and move further from their extended kin, moms and dads go global, too. We join parenting groups (I love mine!), make playdates, search for sitters online using giant databases of profiles (check out sittercity.com to see what I mean). Perhaps it has always been the case that “It Takes a Village” to raise a child, but the village is virtual these days.
I can’t help but wonder if all this social networking hasn’t had a paradoxical effect. We’re more connected than ever and yet we’re lonelier. We spend increasing amounts of time crafting our “selves” online (personal or professional profiles, websites, blogs). Yet our identities feel less authentic, our brands less compelling. It’s hard to tell what is real and what is creative fiction.
Interviewers for the General Social Survey asked people the following question:
“From time to time, most people discuss important matters with other people. Looking back over the last six months, who are the people with whom you have discussed matters important to you?” List their first names or initials.
Stop and answer this on scratch paper before you read on…
Come on, humor me and answer it.
The result? The number of close confidants reported has dropped nearly one third, from 2.94 to 2.08 in the last 20 years. The drop is depressing, but the absolute number is sadder still. In the year 2004, the average person said they discussed important matters with only 2 people?! What kind of social networking is that?
Social connections are important stress busters and they’re still the way business gets done. So before you update that profile, take a few minutes to invite a friend or coworker to lunch. Oh, and don’t forget to call your mom.
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